Yowling Yodelers

In my opinion, yodeling sounds like a lemur being blended up in a helicopter propeller that's made out of jello. But you know, you can't blame lemurs for the screeching sounds that come out of their mouth. Anyone in that situation would sound the same. Actually, if a leprechaun were being blended up, I bet it would sound a bit more interesting. Extra credit to anyone who tries it. Just not at home.

Anyways, speaking of yodelers, yodel actually means to utter the syllable "yo." Doesn't that mean that all you should hear is, "yooooooooyooyoyooooyooyoyoyoy?" But for some reason, that is not the case. Instead we hear a bunch of, "Yoddlegurgleyeaaaaaohdelalalagobblelinglingla." According to my calculations, yodelers need to learn how to actually yodel instead of sounding like turkeys.

The real reason that yodeling was even invented was not to show off your zero musical talent, but to communicate with herders in the alps. Yes, the alps. Like where they make chocolate. You know what I always say... "What happens in the alps stays in the alps." That should've been the case, but then a bunch of very nonintellectuals decided to give life to a dying art. Actually, it isn't even art. It's a misplacing of what could, if you lived in China, be referred to as talent.

Believe it or not, there is an article on Wikipedia called, "First Professional Yodelers in the United States." What a paradox. No one in their right mind would put the words "professional" and "yodel" in the same sentence. I no longer respect Wikipedia as I once did. Any website that has a full page on yodeling does not deserve even an ounce of respect.

Moral to story: if you want to waste your life yowling like Tarzan and wearing nothing but a cloth, go ahead. But as for me, I am going to spend my time wisely....writing about the peculiarities of human nature.

If you're wondering where the picture is from, it's from here.